AY FUCK.
i hate my IDMI group.
stupid.
why must YOU and YOU be inside D:
damnit.
i shall find happiness in kellie during that week):

today was LOL and RAAAH.
let's just say the raah part was the really ruined sci fair thingy.
sry natasha.
i know you put in alot of effort in it):

and the lol part was SJ!
haha.
xy: "the guy looks dead..."
(pointing to CPR dummy)
everyone else: "he is dead =.="
lol.
and xy do cpr damn funny lah.
like robot like that.
xy: "SIR, SIR ARE YOU ALRIGHT?"
*stones*
me: *whispers* "help call ambulance 995 & get AED"
xy:"CALL 995 & GET AED!"
*stones again*
me:*whispers* "check for foreign object"
xy: *stares into the mouth of the dummy*
me:*whispers* "open the mouth using right thumb"
xy: *does what i say* "SIR, IS THERE ANY FOREIGN OBJECT?"
staff justin: "no"
xy: *stones again*
me: *says the next step in the sequence*

and the cycle went on until she finished.
and xy forgot to pinch the nose;
totally opposite of when she forgot to let go of the nose last time XD

haha.
then she had to do cpr again when i finished X)
damndamndamn funny lah.

and the pulse thingy feels damn weird.
like this thingy that will jump on the dummy's throat.

then FA test results.
got 29.
and highest in squad.
and i SWEAR i really random-ed some T/Fs...
even though charlotte doesn't seem to believe it .__.

then walked to mrt with haihua and xy!
damndamndamn funny.
HH, you SUAY.
step on *sth* and kena the snrs behind us XD
heng they nvr see,
if not you DIE.
lol.

guitar lessons starting TMR!
haha.
happy(:

today was BIZLAB!

damn funny lah.
ikea!
kellie couldn't find us XD
and went straight past us,
talking on the phone to us,
until i sticked my hand out XDXD
and the kids showroom was damn fun(:
ikea is like the bestest place to play

AND ISAAC IS LIKE RAWR.
1) i going to ikea with y'all.
then while we eating lunch,
2) i not going to ikea liao. i going pearl hse with wang.
then when we just left ikea and is going towards the PIE,
3) EH, can pick me up from tampines mrt?

like LOL.
then had to turn here and there to get to the mrt.
and he couldn't see us at all,
even though the car was like IN FRONT of him.

then PEARL'S HSE!
did bizlab on the roof until it rained,
then moved into outside pearl's room.

I AM DAMN SHOCK THAT ISAAC CAN DRAW!
lol.
damndamndamn impressed with him now.
his drawing is like damn nice lah!
(i'm gonna BUY the cup he drawed)
haha.
and then slacked pretty much,
and killed isaac's gunz character like 2174632795643952 times X:
and shaun's getamped character 329567926579256 times X)

haha...
then did more cups,
slacked more,
talked alot abt random stuff,
then went to amk hub for dinner with:
Amanda!, PEarl!, Kellie!, HuiJun! and shaun XD
lol.
and talked alot abt erhmerhmerhm.
<3 amanda!

then went home,
and suddenly realised that haven't bought stuff for sci yet,
panicked on the mrt,
smsed alot,
then went home and realised amanda, huijun & pearl finishing it already.
sry ppl.
i feel so guiltyD:

anyways,
today was damn fun.
and amazing.
lol.
LEEWAY van XDXD

SPORTS DAY.
hot, tiring, boring.
and going shopping for bizlab was funny.
was complaining abt erhmerhmerhm.
lol.
and got home CHAODAH!
and kellie thought raffles city was at raffles mrt ._.

FLAG DAY.
hot, tired, pathetic.
peter was damn hyper.
his can is like FULL can?
not like mine, less than half ._.
and now, i'm damn stinky, starving, and sleepy.
ugh.
when is pearl coming online?

ugh.
just SHUTUP abt the overseas trip.
i'm not going for either,
because of REAL family probs.
(not like huijun ._.)
and pearl and amanda prob. know what they are.
rawr.
feel emo again.

stupidstupidstupid laptop.
don't allow me to see blogs anymore .__.
grr.
have to go search the other 3 comps in my hse for the one that kena the network virus.
damnit.

you promised to let me go to any trip i wanted if i didn't go to the SJ cambodia trip,
but it was just a bunch of lies...
so stop giving excuses.
don't make me promises that you can't keep.
it's hurting my feelings more than if you didn't...

discrimination.
something that happens everywhere in the world,
no matter whether it's in school, at home, wherever.
it takes place without us actually knowing that we're doing it,
and usually ends up as trouble.

we can discriminate against everything:
people's attitudes, habits, culture, skin colour, heritage, whatever;
as long as we don't have what they have,
we discriminate.

even in class.
we discriminate junkai.
sure,
he may be really vulgar/APed at times,
but it is partially our fault,
aint it?
the guys pick on him,
the girls just plain don't like him,
may that be the reason why he doesn't feel that he's part of this class?
may that be why his behaviour is so,
so that we can at least notice him;
even if it's for the wrong reasons?

i dunno.
maybe that's just me.
cos i don't really know junkai and stuff,
but i guess mr tan is someone we all know,
yea?

we discriminate mr tan for being AP, emo, and sadist,
but is he really like that;
or is it the way we are treating him that he is treating us back?
if you think about it,
the way we treat him is as if we're taking him for granted.
the whole of last year,
when have we, as a class,
gave him a piece of assignment that was sastifactory?
and throughout the whole year,
even though we were really taking advantage of mr tan,
he only scolded us once.
and then after that,
nothing has changed.
i guess that's what pissed him off.
the fact that we're not trying hard enough.
maybe he's just trying to make us try harder,
to show him that we're not what he thinks we are,
using reverse psychology and whatever.

ugh.
i dunno what i'm talking about anymore.
and alina,
i didn't see any posts about "my fragile heart" and whatever.
in fact,
the only "fragile" i typed was in the previous, previous post?
sth about the fragile relationship,
which i just typed for fun.
so yea.
whatever you saw and didn't understand was probably abt p. sch humans.

&what you said just made me think more about whether it was you or me that made the wrong decision to become friends...

xl is seriously worrying me.
and he still refuses to tell me what happened.
rawr. nvm.
just cheer up soon, kay?
yepyep.
if you ever read this,
even if the whole world gives up on you,
i'll always be there, yea? (:

to dunmanians:
no. he's not my bf, or crush, or whatever shit.
he's this guy who i've know for... 9years?
yep. it's sibling love.
simple as that.

hello emo-ness,
byebye my hope that today wouldn't be emo.
&i never thought that i'll feel this way again;
no it's not love, i'm sure of it.
love isn't supposed to be this blackhole in my heart,
right?

post #50 since jan.

nth much to post abt,

just that i think that i'm gonna die falling into the mrt track,

cos i might one day just fall asleep waiting for the train.

- this is how exhausting school is.



and scrap the turning vegetarian thing.

i can't live a day without ham or chicken.



damnit.

there goes one thing that i kinda promised myself to do.

rawr.

i dunno what to blog about.
just feel that the world is coming to a standstill
- or is it only me? -
hmm.
i love this quote:
"what's wrong will never be right;
even if the whole world is doing the wrong thing,
it doesn't make it right"

so yea.
stop saying i'm doing the wrong thing.
cos for all you know,
you're wrong.

and jy XL, for turning vegetarian.
i can't live a week without pizza X:
OKAY.
i shall try eating meat only ONCE or twice a week.
if i can help it.
X:

and i thought forgetting would be hard,
but now, i don't even remember - was our relationship that fragile?

came to this conclusion today:
it doesn't matter how much i try.
people only want to see the result,
not the process.
so yea.
i'm gonna make you see the results.
someday.

and another conclusion:
smart guys are not shuai guys,
while shuai guys are not smart guys.
which means,
amanda will probably end up marrying a guy tt's dumber than her,
but very shuai X)

&i'd rather you say it to my face than talk behind my back:
at least it wouldn't hurt so much...

supposed to do bizlab now,
but the VP and the P not online,
so yea,
i'm slacking.
cos i dunno what else to type on the slides.
(which i think are damn nice :D)
lol.
cresmicians, look forward to it tmr XD

today sucked.
#1: IT'S MONDAY.
monday means SCHOOL which means TIE which means ASSEMBLY,
and therefore sucked.
#2: THERE'S PE!
and PE means sweat, and sweat means stink, and stink means YUCK.
#3: IT'S THE FIRST DAY OF SCH
which means i still feel like holiday-ing
#4: I FELL ASLEEP IN SCIENCE
in result of #3, and thus i missed out alot of stuff hanhan said.
#5: MATH.
which is simply yuck.
#6: MATH POP QUIZ
i finished HALF of the questions, and HALF of the questions i answered are WRONG.
#7: I ALMOST DIED AT THE ZOO.
stupid tram.

so yea.
today sucked,
damn.
all hw to be chionged today.
and wc is seriously funny.
tell you why next time.
lol.

ok, so i've been thinking alot again.
about which people are significant to me,
and which people are not.
so yea.

very significant humans:
- my family :D
- XL! ((: lol.
aka the guy who gave me the lecture
- AMANDA! (:
my twin-ny
- PEARL! (:
my captain
- HUI JUN! (:
the person who made me go to ikea and buy the cup and she forgot to bring hers XD
- KELLIE! ((:
the human that emos with me (surprised? lol.)
- XINYI! ((:
my one&only dearest shuaii ge XDXD
AND MY HAMSTERS :D
even though they're not humans :X

significant humans:
- JIAMIN!
the human that gets hungry easily :D
- JIAYING!
cresmic's trumpet player ^^
- ALINA!
CS member and very smart human :X
- AMOS!
the guy who everyone thought was my bf o.O
ps. it's not true.
- MY SQDMATES!
what are sqdmates for? lol.
- VIVIEN!
my deardear artistic fren :D
- SHAKESPEARE!
nope. she's not william XD
- VALERIE!
fahrenheit&lollipop&whatnot fan. lol.
can't blame me for not knowing. i'm not chinese educated human. haha.

slightly significant humans:
- other CRESMICIANS :D
what can i say?
- other 6A-IANS :DD
<33
- CHURCH HUMANS XD
yep. my sisters and brothers X)
- the people i admire and get inspiration from ((:
eg. peter lewis kingston wentz the third :D

NOT significant humans:
everyone else XD

and it's true.
i shall get emo for only the people who are significant.
and xl, do i have a right/need to emo over my friends now?
lol.

ugh.
i'm being lectured on why i can't emo cos i don't have the need/right to emo.
and which kinds of ppl i'm supposed to be emo for.
raah.
and surprisingly,
it's making sense.

&i shouldn't be emo for you,
cos i don't feel the pinch anymore...

lala.
today was LOL.
went to pearl's hse to do bizlab,
and pepsi decided to love me and stuck to me the whole day
(and got jealous went i did math and used my laptop.)
and played ONE round of T or D,
and the bottle hates me,
so yea,
chose dare,
and WC dared me to say i like him.
lol.
which in the end didn't happen cos wc is such a nice guy.
lol.
ok,
so did pwpt (most of the details anyway,)
and finished the other cup,
which wc used HALF the tube of paint for,
and errrrrrrrm.
blogged and msn-ed,
even though me and pearl supposed to do geog.
yea.
so now slacking at her hse until my dad comes.
raah.
sian.
amd stanley's not replying.
haha.

have no idea what to post about.
feeling abit emo,
but not enough to get myself thinking really deep.
one more week to hell.

STD2'08 ARE FINALLY LCPLs!
WHOOOO!
and BENEDICTUS is FIRST :D
haha.
benny welcomes:
PETER! the cute little guy who's shorter than daniel X:
JIAYI! my dear 1C jnr :DD
YIFANG! my other dear 1C jnr :DD
WANXIN! the girl who lives in yishun/woodlands. :D
SHITING! the other girl who lives in yishun/woodlands. :D
lol.
can't rmb which is which.
haha.
<3 SJ(:

&the records just keeps skipping, and the lies just keep slipping...

i hate you.
i hate you for breaking the clique up;
i hate you for being so selfish;
i hate you for faking to like me;
i hate you for pretending to everyone;
i hate you for rephrasing our conversations so that it makes everyone think i'm at fault;
i hate you for discriminating others;
i hate you for always taking but never giving to others;
i hate you for making me think you're my fren when you're just leeching us out;
i hate you for making me lose all my frens;
i hate you for always trying to make me feel horrible inside;
in short, i really hate you.

i reallyreallyreally have no idea why things must end up like this,
but i can say you're the one and only person i've ever hated in my life so far.
seriously.
just try to think how i would feel.
suddenly,
you turn up and leech youself to the clique,
and start to get rid of me,
cos i can't give you anything you want.
if i had other frens in dunman,
i won't mind,
but i don't.
BUT OTHER THAN THOSE IN THE CLIQUE, I DON'T HAVE OTHER FRENS THAT I CAN TRUST COMPLETELY.
that's why i can't afford to lose them.
it's why i don't want to lose them.
but i lost them.
to you.
and now school has no meaning except for my bleak future.

i don't even want to come to sch anymore,
cos going means i'll see y'all include me out of sympathy.
and i don't like it.
i'd rather you just ignore me,
and let me live my loner life,
rather than pretending to be my fren,
and make me more torn up inside than i already am.

i can see the little looks you give to each other when i'm talking,
i can hear the way you all laugh genuinely when you're with each other,
i know when you all have a secret that doesn't include me.
but i try to ignore them,
because i don't want to break you all up.

i really tried to change myself to not make you dislike me more,
but i have no idea why you just hate me.
the way you ask each other for stuff,
and i end up as the last one to be asked,
i just feel so insignificant...

i know i'm not as smart as y'all,
not as rich as y'all,
not as fit in sports as y'all,
not as popular as y'all,
but i do have feelings.
and you're seriously hurting it.

i'm already trying really hard to forget everything when i'm in sch,
and cry only when i'm at home, in my room,
but sometimes,
i just feel like i could break down.
afterall,
i'm only human.

and now,
i don't know what else to do but leave the clique and forget the love i have for y'all.
sry to those who really care,
but i don't think that i can take this any longer...

&sometimes it hurts so much, i don't feel anything...

i feel happy!
cos std 2'08 are LANCE COPORALS (sp?) on 08.03.08!
lol.
jy squad. let's show 'em that SMALL IS POWERFULL :DD

haha.
and GUITAR LESSONS!
few more days and i'm signing up :D
damn happy.
i want a blue acoustic.
wonder how much it costs D:

I'm holding out and I'm holding on
To every letter and every song
I pulled myself out of the day we ever had to meet
You're through with me?


So...


And when it all goes to hell
will you be able to tell me
"Sorry." with a straight face?


And when it all goes to hell
will you be able to tell me
"Sorry." with a straight face?


(Let's Go!)


I'm all ears and I'm all scars
To hear you tell me: "Boy's like you try too hard
To not look quite as desperate without hanging on."
But I still know the way to make your makeup run.

So...


And when it all goes to hell
will you be able to tell me
"Sorry." with a straight face?

And when it all goes to hell
will you be able to tell me
"Sorry." with a straight face?



And when it all goes to hell...
And when it all goes to hell...
And when it all goes to hell...

And when it all goes...

I couldn’t resist.
It makes me feel unemo.
And I’m resisting the temptation of going into a state of emoness...

supposed to chiong geog now,
but whatever.
my bloody printer refuses to switch on,
and i have to ask alot of ppl to help me print,
cos all MY PRINTER DO GEOG UNTIL NO INK LIAO!
lol.
so tmr have to stayback and do reflections.
i think i seriously work damn hard.
XP

i'm surprised that nearly failing maths didn't make me as emo as i thought i'ld be.
rather, it was your reaction to it.
(this time, it doesn't refer to any dunmanian)
we were supposed to be friends.
and you're one of the reallyreally few that i reallyreally trust.
and yet you had to rip another piece off the remaining of my heart.
i hate you.

rawr.
and i promised myself to be happy because it's xl's bday.
but i broke it within the first half hour of school.
thank you very much.

&the world's just a big fat asshole full of shitty people like you and me...

&life's cruel.
FACE IT.

current song: lonely no more, rob thomas
current feeling: NIL.
i don't feel anything.

&when we all go to hell,
will you be able to tell,
me sorry with a straight face?

- take this to your grave

the lyric of my life now...

Profile

CHRISTINE(:
♥ Edward Cullen
turns older on 18 October
and is currently studying at DHS :D
Child of God
& ♥s her CG (LOL of WEFC)

Loves & Hates

LOVES:

HIM
The Twilight Series
Edward Cullen
Rocking xD
Going to the theatres
Shopping
Being alone in my room
Reading
My Clique♥
My hamsters :D
My Squad(:
House of the Dead 4 X:
My imagination;
My secret world ♥

HATES:

Being interupted when reading
Being lied to
Betrayals
Bitches
The darkness that looms at the edge of happiness